I Am Woman

"Women are always beautiful." ~~Ville Valo

 

-3°C|26.6°F Temperature

-7.5°C|18.6°F Wind Chill

Skies: Partly Cloudy 

Visibility (miles): Unrestricted 

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Station Pressure: 29.409 in.

Three weeks ago I shaved my head for the second time in my life. Four years ago I partook in this fund raising event called the St. Baldrick’s Foundation. It was one of the first New Year’s Resolutions that I 100% followed through on. I had decided to do something to benefit someone else. Not a bad resolution, eh? By participating in this event, I had agreed to raise money by shaving my head. The money I raised would be donated to fight children’s cancer.

The St. Baldrick's Foundation Website

I decided my 27th birthday would be the day I went bald. I had three months to raise money. My hair was pretty long and since St. Baldrick’s didn’t do anything with your hair, I decided to donate it to Locks of Love as well in order to not waste it. Locks of Love makes wigs out of the donated hair.

The Locks of Love Website

When my 27th birthday rolled around, I raised over $300.00, donated my hair, and went bald in support of those who couldn’t have hair. It was a pretty amazing experience to be a woman with a shaved head. The possibility I would rock a bald head at some point in my life had never really crossed my mind. But there I was. I also never really expected to go thru the phase a second time in my life. It was kind of like one of those done that, been there, seen that kind of thing. But here I am, buzzed head and all.

This time however, it wasn’t a New Year’s Resolution. In some ways it was a spontaneous decision, yet at the same time it wasn’t. There was plenty of thought put into this decision and in the end it felt almost like a want, a need to shave my head. A need for many, many reasons.

My friend Dan from Seward who is also down here working at McMurdo (as a shuttle driver ironically enough) hosted this fund raising event called Mustache Roulette on January 14th. Every summer in Seward this event is held and it’s always a fun time. There the money goes toward something in the community of Seward. Men grow their beards out months ahead of time in anticipation of this public event.

Here at McMurdo, Dan was going to donate the money to the Prostrate Cancer Foundation. A couple of months ago when he told me he was bringing Mustache Roulette to Antarctica I jokingly said I would shave my head for it. Dan fully supported the idea. I was a woman, I didn’t have a beard so they would be shaving a mustache on the back of my head. Pretty ridiculous if I say so myself, but you can get away with anything when you’re in Antarctica. My hair was the longest it had been in years and I was actually getting a little sick of it. I had been considering cutting it for a while, but the idea of shaving my head hadn’t really crossed my mind until then. This is where the spontaneity comes in.

A part of me couldn’t justify cutting my hair short and just tossing the rest of it into the bio-hazard bin to be shipped out years later on a boat back to New Zealand. It felt like a waste. Raising money to fight cancer seemed like a good enough reason and excuse to cut my hair and start all over again with a clean slate. Literally. My cousin had died a year ago after a tough battle with brain cancer. We've all been touched by someone in our lives who lost the battle. I could afford to lose a little hair. Hell we can all afford to lose some hair in consideration of those who fought for their lives against cancer. There is no cure for cancer, but every new day brings the possibility of finding one.

So after a month of heavy thought, I committed myself to the razor. I would help raise money for the Prostrate Cancer Foundation by shaving my head and I would also donate my hair to Locks of Love again. Once you’ve shaved your head once, it’s really not that hard to do it a second time. I knew what I was about to commit myself too. There’s the peach fuzz stage, the bushy stage, and then the out of control stage. Despite my previous experience, it was still a pretty big decision to go bald in Antarctica in a small community that I could not escape from. I knew I would get a lot of attention and that was something I wasn’t sure I wanted to deal with.

Being a woman about to get your head shaved in front of a large crowd whether you're in Antarctica or not, was definitely an experience. I sat down as one woman and stood up another. This memory will stick with me for a long time. A lot of women that winter over down here shave their heads so they won’t have to deal with their hair during the cold months of darkness and winter. It was “summer” now, but I would still be dealing with the shock of cold air against my once well insulated dome. That blast of cold air brought a whole new meaning to brain freeze.

How Mustache Roulette works is that people bid money on these horrendous mustaches that will be shaved onto the face of the poor unsuspecting fool who signed up for the round they qualified in. There are different weight levels based on the girth of your beard. We had a light weight, mid weight, and heavy weight round. Each round would go until there was one last man standing, hence the meaning of roulette.

rou·lette (r -l t ) n. 1. A gambling game in which the players bet on which slot of a rotating disk a small ball will come to rest in.

That person left standing from each round would join the final round to fight to be the very last man/woman left standing with their beard or head of hair intact. Since McMurdo is full of unique people from all walks of life I had really hoped there would be another brave woman in the crowd ready to sacrifice her long locks for a man’s prostrate. As luck would have it, I was a woman who stood alone.

The room buzzed when I sat down to the table of heavy weights. I had a lot of hair and since I was the only woman it was deemed I deserved the honor of being classed with the heavy weights. A pair of clippers was spun on the table in front of us. We all sat with baited breath to see who would be the first to go under the cut of the clippers. Whoever it pointed at, received the mustache that was up for bid at that time.

I struck out on the second spin of the clippers, winning the “Whiskers” mustache. It was surreal walking to the barber’s chair amidst cheering and clapping by a roomful of disbelieving supporters. My friends in the crowd knew I had planned to do this, but for many it was a surprise. I had shaved my head before, but these people didn’t know that. The paparazzi came alive with the buzz of the clippers as my friend Stephanie made the first strike on my head. There was no going back now. 

The before shot

 

And the hair goes away.

That is one awesome mullet

First phase done

Two friends from Alaska getting a hair cut/face trim

A few of the other contestants

It can be just as nerve wracking for a man to get his head shaved or his entire beard, but not many look twice at a man who suddenly looks different because they’re bald or don’t have facial hair any more. But if you’re a woman and you stroll into a room bald when a day ago you had long hair, it’s different. People stare. Men stare. It's been three weeks and they're still staring. 

Why is long hair such a requirement for a woman to be beautiful? To be feminine in some men’s eyes? Our soul and our person is what should make us beautiful to the eye of the beholder, not something as vain as long, black flowing locks. I’m still the same person. My face is the same. My heart is the same. I am me. I am a woman.

In the words of Helen Reddy, “I am woman, hear me roar… I am strong, I am invincible, I am woman.” And I am beautiful. We are all beautiful. Male or female.

 

The end product

The "Whiskers" Mustache. It was pretty creepy. I kept it on for about a day and called it good.

Hair is hair. It grows back, plain and simple. I was told by many my hair wouldn’t grow back the same if I shaved my head. Bull-honky.

I think it’s good for us to go thru something that takes away that that has a significant effect on our physical appearance. It’s grounding and humbling. By being bald, what you see is what you get. There is nothing to hide. In the following days many asked if I regretted shaving my head. Even if I had wanted to regret it, what was the point? There was no going back. You just had to embrace it and go with it. It would grow back.

Those that lose their hair from chemo-therapy or some other disease don’t have a choice. That opportunity is taken out of their hands. We are able to make a decision, have a choice, yet many don’t. There’s too much fear. But what is there to fear? Those with cancer fear death when they lose their hair, but they face it to fight for survival. All we lose is the opportunity to look beautiful. Hair grows back. I can make a sacrifice and shave my head if it will benefit others. Even then, I will not experience what someone with cancer is going thru, but if it will allow someone to have a chance at being healed, why not?

All in all, 27 participants got shaved that night at Mustache Roulette and over $800.00 was raised to be donated to the Prostrate Cancer Foundation. Not bad for such a tiny little community. I’m isolated all the way at the bottom of the world, but I was still able to do something to benefit someone else. It felt good to seal my pony-tail of hair in an envelope and mail out to Locks of Love. Sealed and stamped with love from the Antarctic. 

 

All the money we raised to go to the Prostrate Cancer Foundation

I had a few fans of my long hair here at McMurdo. Some I didn’t even know until they approached me after the shaving. I hope that somewhere out there in the world a child can be given a wig of that same hair and get their own fan club.

We all have beautiful domes, let the world see them.

The hair three weeks later

And remember, we are women, we are invincible, we are strong, and we are women even when we are bald.

I Am Woman

 

I am woman, hear me roar
In numbers too big to ignore
And I know too much to go back an' pretend
'cause I've heard it all before
And I've been down there on the floor
No one's ever gonna keep me down again

Oh yes I am wise
But it's wisdom born of pain
Yes, I've paid the price
But look how much I gained
If I have to, I can do anything
I am strong
I am invincible
I am woman

You can bend but never break me
'cause it only serves to make me
More determined to achieve my final goal
And I come back even stronger
Not a novice any longer
'cause you've deepened the conviction in my soul
 

I am woman watch me grow
See me standing toe to toe
As I spread my lovin' arms across the land
But I'm still an embryo
With a long long way to go
Until I make my brother understand

Oh yes I am wise
But it's wisdom born of pain
Yes, I've paid the price
But look how much I gained
If I have to I can face anything
I am strong
I am invincible
I am woman
Oh, I am woman
I am invincible
I am strong

I am woman
I am invincible
I am strong
I am woman

~~Helen Reddy